How to Behave (Shorts)
Original, Unmodified Speech #
April 26th, 2017 #
I’m going to start my lesson like this:
- Be honest, how many of you know what I’m going to talk about today?
- How many of you saw that I had posted my lesson on Facebook?
- How many of you assume that today’s lesson took me time to make?
You paid attention to me when I began speaking because of many things, but one of them is because on some level you knew that I was prepared, I have something thought out to say, I won’t waste your time. Maybe it’s because you know that I’ve been giving lessons each business meeting, and assumed that today I thought out my lesson just as much. But you don’t need to do much to seem like you have something planned. I have nice clothes on, and that in itself is enough to make you think that I have something planned to say. If you spend about a minute putting fancy clothes, and an additional minute posting a google doc with complete nonsense on Facebook, it adds so much without you actually doing anything.
Some quick thing to touch on—people always say to be yourself. I agree that you shouldn’t do things that you don’t want to, but there is nothing wrong with acting differently in different situations. You might be less talkative while taking a test, than when you’re out socializing at lunch. You might also avoid putting on some kind of deodorant, or talking about some sensitive topic next to your significant other even though it might be your favorite deodorant or some exciting topic. You aren’t changing who you are, you are just adapting to your situation. Being yourself doesn’t mean being the same everywhere.
People think that they should smile when they’re happy. I agree. What I disagree with, is the notion that you shouldn’t smile when you’re unhappy. Yes, being happy can make you smile, but people often miss that smiling can make you happy. Your outward appearance affects your inward emotions and feelings. Not only that, it is contagious in the sense that you visibly being happy can make others around you happy (both outwardly and inwardly). This is why I avoid being sad in public—I don’t want it to spread to others. Yes, I actively avoid being visibly sad; nobody around me deserves to be sad, so it isn’t right for me to spread the feeling onto them. Furthermore, I don’t deserve to be sad, so I should make myself happy. Of course you are encouraged to share your emotions with those close to you, so they could help you deal with them, but not in public. Avoid the spread, be happy.
Next post #
In the next post, we take a detour from our usual topics, as I give a talk about an award I had recently received.